Chasing the money trail

Tomorrow is our graduation day. I was watching "Shakespeare in Love" at this very moment before I decided to skip the film and start scribbling my thoughts here. I am bothered. No, just confused, well, which makes me bothered too!

I was supposed to take copy writing examination today in one of the country's leading networks (Yep, that's a clue). I applied for the writer position and came for an interview and exam last week. I passed the screening and the HR endorsed me to take the copy writing exam with the station's media asset department, supposedly today. But I didn't come. I know, I know, it was bad and unprofessional of me. And I missed the opportunity. But, ugh, in my heart of hearts, it's not what I want NOW.

Okay, so I'm making myself more confused. I was born to be a writer. My mind thinks a lot of crazy, smart and innovative ideas. I am not a good speaker so I channel it to writing. But I think I grew tired of it. No, not really. Not seriously. I'm not saying I don't want to write anymore nor want to waste my four years of education and let everything past the drain. Hey, it's all I've ever dreamed of. Writing is in my blood, in my heart. But i just don't want it to be my profession right now, right away.

When I was still young and whiny, I'd always say I want to be a writer and I want to be rich. But I've never realized then that I couldn't get rich if I am a writer. Yes, some writers are rich because they were rich to begin with! Some writers get rich because of their genius novel they labored for how many years. And in this bad economy, I am not both or can't do both. I am not rich to begin with. My parents just valued education so badly they sent us to a premiere University. I'm not that genius but not below average and I am not saying that I can't be genius! It takes hard work, hard work and hard work! And this is not the time to be unpractical! I don't want to be a starving artist and of course, I want to repay my parents with all their hardships they made just to send us to school.

Yeah, I want to get rich. I want to earn well, really well, to support my family and the lifestyle that I wanted. And I've already laid the blueprint on how I will travel my way to the penny lane. And I am ready to be a cut-throat bitch if the situation requires it! :)

After a year of earning cold and thick cash, I am ready to go back on my first love and pursue my dream of writing for magazine/TV shows. In that way, I won't really care how much I am going to earn because by that time, I am contented with my lot.

I will get rich. I will get rich. I will get rich.
(Insert prayers, hard work and cross fingers too)


"Whenever you want to achieve something, keep your eyes open, concentrate and make sure you know exactly what it is you want. No one can hit their target with their eyes closed."


I can, I am and I will! :)

What I am loving right now

As graduation day nears, I have more quality time to spend with my family, Jeff and myself.

And these are the things that make me happy, either purchased or not!

1. Two perfect schus! Yok Han's gift for me!

This one he chose for my graduation day! Yok Han also picked my dress we bought at Topshop. Well, this man has classic taste when it comes to clothing, really. I will be in an all-black ensemble, with laces and ribbons, hoping to pull off that look without looking like someone died! ;p


This comfy and stylish flats in snakeskin he chose for our trip to Hong Kong, Macau and China. Because Yok Han seems to spoil me again on shopping sprees, I am taking him to the shoe salon next week! :)

2. Half-gallon of ice cream stashed in our fridge I am eating now while bathed in sweat and still burning fats. Don't you love summer at all?

3. My new and improved healthy lifestyle: Early morning jogging, exercise and decreased food intake!

4. Good reads! I am now reading a lot of good books because I have more time to do so! Yay!

5. Good movies! It's like rummaging all the good and classic movies in my Father's betamax cabinet! Hahaha!

6. And, oh by the way, last night, I was in utter bliss. Twas the "Meet the Parents" night. Our own version; Yok Han's parents met mine and my parents met his' as well. Wedding bells, eh? Definitely, it's would not be too soon!

A Happy baby makes for a happy family

Since Shannen stepped into this world, our life really changed, a lot. Our family grew closer, stronger and bigger! We always have a reason to look forward going home because of Shannen. We made time to take Shannen to theme parks, malls and even to her pedia visits! It was when I realized that we made time for the family, for ourselves.

See, Shan is the first grandchild of my parents. And so, we have given this little child all the love that she needs suffice to fill the not-so-affirming-presence of his Father.

Oh well, family can be complete without him. And we'll make sure that we'll arm Shan all the knowledge she needs to survive this world and grow up to be a fantabulous person without a trace of imperfection, if possible. That's how we live this kid, really.

Hello Shannen! Smiling giddily with her Chinese birthday dress! Isn't she lovely?


Shannen and I. She's trying to pout her lips like I did, but she can't compete. Haha!

This is Shannen pointing towards the horses, cars and buildings as we travel to Manila.


She got scared of the fishes at first, climbing to her Lola for protection. After 5 minutes or so, she eventually get the hang of it. Welcome to Ocean park baby!


Lolo to the rescue! Eventually, Papa was the only person that made Shan come closer to those aquariums. Lolo's girl indeed!

My dear Sister Angela and her little angel.


Afraid? Not anymore!

Hey baby, what are you excited of eh? This picture makes me want to pinch your button nose!

Apparently, Shan's favorite food is fish! Haha! Maybe she's hungry at this very moment! Yikes!

This child is in very good hands, really!

The Mom, Dad and Shan.

Oh well, it was a tiring day but we went home soo happy. Guess it is true when they say "A happy mommy makes for a happy baby." But in our case, a happy baby makes for a happy family indeed!

I have the bestest parents ever!

I am soo happy because I have the bestest parents on the planet...ever!

I love you Mama and Papa. Soo much! As soon as I get back here, I'll start working my ass off to provide you the lifestyle and the leisure time you have never had for yourselves! Promise!

Indeed, that vacay is finally on!

I want the FREE BORACAY VACATION...

...for my parents.

See folks, My beloved Mama and Papa never had real vacation these so many years. Maybe when we were little kids, they still manage to go out of town but they still tag us along with them. But since my sisters and I entered grade school until we are bound to finish college this March (Yes, finally, my younger sister and I are graduating!), they never experienced any. They also never had a proper honeymoon, I think. Since my mother got pregnant out of wedlock, they started to live together after their wedding and worry about their finances.

As small entrepreneurs, my parents knew no holidays. They always work, work and work. When we wake up in the morning they're off to work, when we got back home from school they are asleep and when we are in the middle of our sweet dreams at night they will leave the house. My parents only rest on days that I can count with less than the fingers of one hand.

December 25, January 1, 2 and 3.

See? And during that days, they prefer to sleep, eat and rest in the house. That is why I want to win a free Boracay vacation for my parents. They have been selfless and hard working they forgot their needs and wants. They set aside their selves for our future. And this coming graduation, I want to give this gift to them (Please WOW Philippines Travel Agency, please choose me =/). But since I am still unemployed and dependent on them, I rummaged the internet for promos and stumbled upon the Wow Philippines Travel Agency Boracay Vacation Promo. In celebration of their fifth year, they are giving off a FREE Boracay Package complete with 5 Star accommodations at the luxurious Le Soleil de Boracay Beach Resort on Boracay Island for two. This is perfect for my Mama and Papa. Below is the complete deets of the contest.


Win a Free Boracay Vacation Package by WOW Philippines Travel Agency

WOW Philippines Travel Agency, Inc. is celebrating it's 5th year in business during July of 2010, and we would like you to have a chance to celebrate with us, so we have decided to give-away a FREE Boracay Package complete with 5 Star accommodations at the luxurious Le Soleil de Boracay Hotel on Boracay Island. The lucky winner will win the following Boracay vacation package.

Vacation Package Inclusions:
- 5 Days / 4 Nights Luxury 5 Star Accommodations at the Le Soleil de Boracay Hotel
- Flights to Boracay from Manila to Caticlan Airport on Philippine Airlines
- Island Transfers - Door-to-Door from Manila to the resort and back to Manila
- Three (3) Meals each day, Breakfast, Lunch & Dinner
- Boracay Activities - Horseback Riding, Island Hopping, Glass Bottom Boat
- PLUS - 5,000 peso Spending Cash

Read More Information: http://www.boracay-packages.com

Though I haven't been to Boracay and wanted to go there for myself, I wanted to win this contest for my parents. In little way like this, I will be start to be selfless like what my parents did for me. For my parents and family, I will always be selfless from now on. I want Mama and Papa to go to Boracay and enjoy their selves like they never did before. I want them to relax and unwind for five days in a luxury accomodation at Bora. I want them to enjoy, be happy and think of their wants and needs now because they have neglected it for soo many years.
I love you to bits!

I am crying my heart out to Wow Philippines to choose me and pick me, for my parents' leisure time. Cross fingers.

I know a lot of you guys also wanted this, if you want to join, follow this.

A sucker for knowledge

I don't want to be a sucker for life.

A psychologist slash guidance counselor said, in my exit interview, that it is okay to be a sucker because it forces you out of your comfort zone. She said that as jobs are hard to acquire these days, we have to be tough and content with the job that we are going to have and eat all the irons and shits our bosses will give us and be a sucker for life, if possible.

No, I don't want to do it. Not because I don't want to be reprimanded, cursed, manipulated or anything. I won't stay in a job that is not fulfilling. I won't stay in a job that beats the hell out of my sanity and gives me a below average pay. I won't stay in a job that does not help me to become better and experienced. It won't work for me.

My take is, it is okay if you are not happy and contented with what you are doing only if you are able to grow, to learn and gain something from it. But if none, you can cut it out your life. It is okay if you're not enjoying your job, but as long as you get something like superb knowledge from it and you become better in anything you're doing at..then suck it all off.

As I am finished with my internship and halfway through academic requirements, I realized more things that I wanted to achieve. I want to be better and when I say better it does not necessarily mean better values or morals. I want to a better communicator, writer, thinker and everything else in my mental faculties. Being surrounded by great and brilliant people at work inspires me to be one. Sometimes I really feel stupid and all that, haha! Yes I am insecure of my own self. I act weird whenever at work and maybe my superiors have no idea that I don't know what they are talking about. One time I sat with them for their story conference and I was quiet with a handful of ideas, yet I kept my mouth shut.

I was afraid to make mistakes. I was afraid that if I blurt out an idea it won't be welcomed. Because they are too brilliant to buy it.

Afterwards I realized that I shouldn't have acted that way. It was my only chance. It was the only chance I've got to prove I am as good as them. That I exists. Haha!

Oh well, can't take back the hands of time and so I promised myself that one day, I will walk down that hall with confidence and knowledge that they can use someone like me.

And that's me talking like a sucker, but hey, I would love to be a sucker for life, love and knowledge!

PMS and stars

Actually, although the above has nothing in relation with each other, those are symbols I used for what makes me feel despicable and happy (such an irony eh?) at the same time.

In my biological calendar, my monthly period is fast approaching and so I feel tenderness of my chests, out of this world mood swings and a whole lot more i have to go through every month.
I am easily irritated during my PMS. I get tired easily and hate everyone who laughs and speaks loud. Thank God for chocolate cakes it swept temporarily .my PMS away.

I also feel happy because today is the opening of the Lasallian days, and for a kick-off event, it was pretty awesome. As in A-W-E-S-O-M-E! The human Lasallian Star was so fun I really felt proud while singing the alma mater. The fireworks display was son fantabulous i was screaming my heart out. Yeah, last year i wasn't present in the event for the reason that I don't just like it. But now I attended because I want to be part of it, I want to be active in my last days as a college student. Haha. I understand some people don't see the point in attending that kind of event but hey, without them the event was so successful. I felt that despite differences, the students can be one even just for 15 minutes. I felt that everyone is willing to contribute for the school's success and that they went to the event because of their enthusiasm and love for their school.

Involvement.

For now, I'm off to bed to rest. Actually I dunno why I have been feeling restless these past few days. Ciao!

I also want this nation for my children, our children

I came from a seminar today where ideals of restoring the pride in being a Filipino through journalism was discussed.

Ms. Lara Parpan, EIC of Women's Health Magazine shared a speech called "A Nation for our Children" by Pepe Diokno. I googled it and I was moved by it. I learned today that more important than feeling hopeless and powerless in political turmoils in our country, is our capability to care and do something for our country.

Find time to read below!

“A Nation for Our Children”

“A Nation for Our Children” was delivered late in 1984. At that time Pepe was deeply involved in trying to unify the opposition against the fascistic but failing regime of Ferdinand E. Marcos. This important and crucial task did not prevent him from delineating in near-lyrical language his dream of a nation for all Filipino children- a just, humane and free society. - Priscila S. Manalang

There is one dream that all Filipinos share: that our children may have a better life than we have had. So there is one vision that is distinctly Filipino: the vision to make this country, our country, a nation for our children.

A NOBLE nation, where homage is paid not to who a man is or what he owns, but to what he is and what he does.

A PROUD nation, where poverty chains no man to the plow, forces no woman to prostitute herself and condemns no child to scrounge among garbage.

A FREE nation, where men and women and children from all regions and with all kinds of talents may find truth and play and sing and laugh and dance and love without fear.

A JUST nation where whatever inequality exists is caused not by the way people act towards each other but by differences in natural talents; where poverty, ignorance, and hunger are attacked and every farmer has land that no one can grab from him; every breadwinner, a job that is satisfying and pays him enough to provide a decent standard of living; every family, a home from which it cannot be evicted; and everyone, a steadily improving quality of life.

An INDEPENDENT nation which rejects foreign dictation, depends on itself, thinks for itself, and decides for itself what the common good is, how it is to be attained, and how its costs and benefits are to be distributed.

An HONORABLE nation where public powers are used for the public good and not for the private gain of some Filipinos and some foreigners; where leaders speak not only well but truthfully and act honestly; a nation that is itself and seeks to live in peace and brotherhood with all other nations of the world.

Is this vision attainable? Or is it just an idle dream? If we base ourselves on today, we would be tempted to conclude that it is an idle dream. For our country today is in a mess. There is no other way to describe its condition.

The never ending story

The danger of being a student journalist comes in when he becomes too cynical and too radical that they tend to peer at every corner of the University’s creamed wall.
Well, that could be an understatement.
I had disappointments to student leaders, rather department underdogs, who knew that irregularities in their very own college exist, but chose not to question and investigate. Most of all, I am losing trust to people who should have lived up to protect the integrity of the University by fostering transparency, and check and balance to its departments but nonetheless connived to hide the inconvenient truth of its dishonesty. Well, I can’t really blame the students if they just shrug their shoulders off every time they come across this topic. Powerlessness. We are powerless given these circumstances, and they who have the power, know very well how to play it.
Wherever the sun shines, in Malacañang, Municipal hall, Police station, Barangay precincts and even inside a private higher education institution, corruption is incessantly happening and hiding. It can be your classmate who collects you a penny for handouts which you really don’t have to pay for. It could be your favorite Social Sciences professor who asks you to buy a copy of his friend’s newly published book to review it, which has nothing to do with your subject matter. It could be your favorite canteen inside the school, your neighbor who sells expired canned tomatoes, and your brother who uses your clothes and shoes when you’re out of the house. Or it could be you, sneaking Php500 from your Father’s stash. Whatever your definition of corruption, it could be found all over the place—even in the holiest and most sinless place you have ever thought of, or so it seems. The feeling of being exposed to misdeeds, dishonesty, bribery, corruption, and power play makes a journalist stand up for what he thinks is right. It is weakening, knowing that behind those warm faces and rhetoric promises are evils hiding— greedy of power, money, and authority. But still, a journalist keeps on investigating, until the day he is gunned down in front of his wife and children.
The feeling of a journalist fighting for honesty, fairness, and integrity makes him look like a powerless guinea pig strangled to death and laughed at by a fat, old, and bald politician. It is weakening. In the school setting, the feeling of being exposed to dishonesty, conspiracy, and corruption makes a student journalist apprehensive. It makes him think what could be the danger of exposing a misdeed to him, all the while thinking for the students’ right to be informed, the students’ welfare, and student service. Unlike regular students, a student journalist would not have the same pride that he has as he first set foot in that institution. He won’t have the same delight he had before because as he enters the school, it would remind him of the conceited personalities, the power play, corruption, and all others he wished he should have not known. Though apprehensive, a student journalist will continuously sniff the lead of the story; he will verify all the facts, and get all sides of the story. The feeling of a student journalist fighting for students’ right to question and information is weakening. It makes him feel like walking on a labyrinth road with a label posted on his forehead which says “I am a student,” and who he talks to is a person in authority.

***

The danger of becoming a student journalist comes in when they become too cynical and too radical, that they tend to peer at every corner of the University’s creamed wall.
Yes it is an understatement.
Student journalists will not become too cynical if they were not exposed to misdeeds of officials who work for them. Student journalists will not be suspicious and pessimistic if we are not aware of the wrongdoings of officials. Student journalists will continue to be vigilant and inquisitive until progressive change and transparency surface inside the institution—no matter how trying hard they seemed to be in the eyes of passive students, and no matter how annoying they seemed to be in the eyes of the officials. Student journalists will seek the truth and write for it. As long as there are irregularities happening but hiding being tipped off by concerned employees and students to student journalists like us, the story will never be finished, and our work as student watchdogs will never end.